Ashes victory lifts gloom as under-strength Cincers come up short (again) at Finchley

Nail-biting excitement, twists and turns, unbearable tension. Sunday's game had it all.
Pity all that was the Ashes at the Oval.
Up at Finchley, Cincers - admittedly minus key players moving house or soothing their aching back (Selfish and Lord Rashbrooke respectively) - were doing what we do best on that fine ground.....losing.
Not even Frank temporarily deserting Finchley for the day to play for us could end our poor run.
The Skip got the ball rolling by calling 'heads' at the toss. It was tails.
Finchley 3rds then tucked in to our bowling to rattle up 233 for 6 off 40.
Opposition skip Guy notched up his 50 and then said, did we mind him retiring as they had an important match next week?
We didn't. It was the only way we were going to get someone new on strike!
But then Test Match switched from seam to spin and quickly snaffled two for 30 off 8 - one of them a blinding slip catch from John 'my shoulder hurts' Pickersgill at first slip.
A taste of things to come? No. Sadly, JP spilled a sharp one of the Skip and Cincers still struggled to get break-throughs.
Frank had opened up at one end, economically but later, Rockie took a fair bit of stick on a lightening outfield.
Newcomer Mike Frame was wayward at first before falling over, banging his head and then taking two wickets (Note: we'll be practising this in the nets over winter).
Bowling figures: Frank one for 22 off 7, Tim 2 for 30 off 8, Mike 2 for 34 off 5, the Skip had one for 38 off 8.
For humanitarian reasons, it is better not to mention Rockie's figures or Chris's.
Oh go on, then - Rockie: none for 66 off 8. Chris: none for 25 off 2.
Tea - the traditional fine Finchley spread - was topped off with posh cake from Jack (yeah, right. Thanks Jodie).
But disastrously, the brownies were late. In fact, Test Match Tim didn't even know there were going to be any. Amy arrived with the trademark cake-tin just as Cincers were going in to bat.
Opening up was Biraj from BK - deputising for Selfish - and Test Match.
Decent start against tight bowling, with 45 off the first 10.
But Biraj perished off a short one.
Tom trotted in but the normally dynamic duo of Lowe and Test Match were becalmed against accurate fare from Finchley who were fielding a stronger side than they brought to Greenwich Park earlier in the season.
After 20 overs, we were still a run or two short of 80 - needing nearly eight an over off the last 20.
Sharp words from the Skip had failed to bring any hurry up but Tom and then - shock of shocks on his recent form - Tim M failed.
Frank came in at five and then we did hurry up. We started taking risks and putting their fielders under pressure.
In fact, the Aussie - in a gruff mood for some reason..hmmm...wonder why? - and Test Match almost got us back on track with the run rate.
But this is Finchley. We never win here.
Frank got caught behind and shortly afterwards, Test Match got run out.
The rest was history, including Tim M triggering Jack for LB despite having scoffed a fair bit of Jodie's cake not two hours before. His way of saying thanks.
We were slow with our overs and so were Finchley, meaning the match ended in gloom and inevitable defeat. Cincers finished on 187 for nine off 40.
Test Match top scored with 67 while Frank got 38.
Result: Cincers lost by 46 runs.
The morale of the tale?
Who cares! We won the Ashes!
* Cincers Man of the Match: Test Match for his two wickets, his 67 runs and his spat with the Skip about getting a move on.

Double brownies takes Cincinnati over the finishing line and Selfish over 2,000 runs

Back to winning ways
Cincers put tour defeats behind them this weekend to notch an impressive victory against Actors Anon at Greenwich Park.
Selfish reached the extraodinary milestone of over 2,000 runs for the team in (almost) four seasons while Tim M wielded the formica to his second successive 50 at Greenwich Park.
Actors acting (no pun intended) skip Jamie won the toss and put Cincers in a 35 over contest in very warm sunshine.
Problem. Test Match had been up all night as the flats above were leaking water into his.
Happily, Amy's brownies - a double helping, no less - were unaffected but the Skip had to get the pads on to resume his old opening role with Selfish.
Note: the Vice-Skip was absent with an injured shoulder. 'I've been dropped.' No, you had an injury. See you next week.
Anyway, the Skip rapidly realised that with Actors comes Sanjeev. He bowls at about 70-odd mph.
Oh dear. Selfish played him superbly and the Skip survived a few off him, including a rather fine backward cut (guess who's writing this rubbish).
It didn't last long. After seven overs, Sanjeev shivered the Skip's timbers bringing Tom to the crease.
He looked on form. More than that, he hit a sparkling cover drive. Through the offside. Yes, the offside. All along the ground.
Tragedy. He then edged one behind on 17 and did what is now known as a Whitstable Walk - so named after Tom walked at Whitstable last month before coming back and querying the dismissal.
This one involved a scenic route out to square leg, a sharp left and then a pointed glance back at the umpire. Who was unmoved.
Enter the Shelving. Tim M is on sparkling form for Cincers.
He soon began spanking the ball to all corners while Selfish powered his own way back into form, punishing the over-pitched ball on a lightening quick outfield.
Actors have a good attack but were probably a bowler short on the day.
Selfish passed 50 without a murmur of applause from Cincers looking on. Not even an acknowledgement from the Meerkat hunched over the scoreboard.
He then passed 2,000 runs for the team since joining in 2005. Still nothing.
Eventually, clapping broke out for Selfish's 63rd run. A new milestone to be marked throughout the cricketing world.
The emotion got to Selfish who promptly got out for 65.
Shelving was joined by Test Match, and the two took Cincers to an impressive 212 for 3 off 35. Shelving finished on 62 not out (he does play for another side but he doesn't get out for Cincers) and Test Match ended on 28 not out.
Tea. What a tea. A joint production by Amy and Test Match. Sumptuous.
Oh god, we've got to take the field. May be one more brownie.
What followed was a curate's egg. Good bowling mixed with dross, not helped by a rather sharp interpretation of the wides rule.
New player Inam - courtesy of Abid - struck a vital early blow removing Actors' Turner who has hurt Cincers in the past.
Then Max bowled a beauty to remove batsman Flood.
Actors revived with number three Sanjeev - he of the quick bowling - smashing his way to 23 until bowler Test Match combined with point fielder Tom to remove him.
Max chipped in with another while the Meerkat put in an impressive spell of 2 for 31 off 6, including the key wicket of oppo skipper Jamie for 35.
Wides, loads of them, marred the performance even allowing for hasty signalling from the umpires.
Actors' Richard tried to wind up one of our number by quipping that the bowling was 'too cr*p to hit' or some such. 'Just a bit of sledging,' the batsman chuckled.
But keeper Adam put in another polished performance by removing batsman Knox with a fine stumping off Craig.
The Skipper brought himself on with nine down and bowled one ball.Owzat! LBW.
Actors were all out for 163 but including 27 wides.
You can't blame the brownies. You can NEVER blame the brownies!
* Man of the Match - Selfish for a superb innings and congratulations on an extraordinary milestone of 2,000 runs.
** Quote of the Day - Tom. 'Skip, I think you should open all the time, with me at 3. You can blunt the openers but I'm always guaranteed to get in fairly early.' Thanks, Tom.
** Other bowling figures: Inam 1 for 21 off 4, Test Match 2 for 25 off 4, Craig 1 for 40 off 6, Abid 1 for 11 off 2.

A damn close run thing - Cincers fall at the last hurdle in thrilling finish to 2009 tour

Whoever said it was easy.
Cincers looked like a deflated balloon at the end of this thrilling duel in the sun.
Day Two of the tour, and this time, Cincers had only a short drive from Cartaxo to the ground.
Still not on time. Big Jim was greeted by one of our opposition - Prebensen, an Indian side from a local factory - with a unique welcome. 'Hello. You are very late.'
The toss again went Cincers' way but this time, the Skip put in the opposition in - mindful of the batting performance the day before and of the night on the tiles in Cartaxo the night before.
That included Big Jim failing to gain access to the one and only nightclub, much to the disgust of veteran clubber JP.
'He who hesitates is lost,' the Vice-Skip observed of Jim's halting attempt to gain entry.
And so the cricket.
Max and Sledger opened up for Cincers, with Jim clearly bruised from his club rebuff.
Sledger took an early wicket before Lord Rashbrooke got in on the act by bowling the opposition skipper and the number four.
But at the other end, opener Amrit began smashing his way to a formidable 80.
In the field, Cincers had a so-so game, with the odd chance going down or - in the case of one skier that landed near the Skipper - not being chased in the first place.
When he came on, Big Jim bagged two - including the key wicket of Amrit off a smart catch by keeper Jack.
This being Portugal, there was the odd language difficulty.
In particular, the Skip's frenzied 'on the boundary, please!' was clearly not in the team phrase book as one of his floaters disappeared for a six over someone's head.
(You know who you are. Please now hang it in shame.)
But Jack took a brilliant stumping off the Skip who got another one bowled.
The Chairman came on to take a wicket in his second over to leave the oppo all out for a formidable 210 off 37 overs.
Jim had 2 for 43 off 8, Max 2 for 34 off 8, Frank 2 for 42 off 8 while Tim had one for 42 off 4, with his wicket coming off his very first ball.
The Skip took 2, for 41 off 5 while the Chairman had one for 1.1 overs.
The Meerkat, formerly known as Rockie, left the fielding lamenting that he hadn't had a bowl.
His time was yet to come.
Tea/lunch was, if anything, even better than Day One with a Portuguese fish pie by Mrs Buccimazza and far too much good stuff to go with it.
When Cincers replied, it was a case of oh so near.
Selfish went - for him - early again after getting unluckily caught down the legside for 17.
But Test Match, wounded by his duck the day before, turned on the skill to hit a superb 69.
He was ably supported by the Vice-Skip who took the odd blow but racked up 26 before getting bowled.
Dan holed out for one but enter the Meerkat to give more than valuable support.
Just when it looked as though Test Match would be there till the end, he was caught behind.
Tragically, there followed two run-outs and just a single from Big Jim, leaving the Meerkat and Max to take us right to the wire.
Three balls to go and four needed. Oh dear, Max holes out after a brave 17.
The Skip comes in.
Four off two. The Meerkat hits the penultimate ball for a scrambled couple.
Two off one for victory. One for a tie.
Cruel game, this.
For probably the first time in his cricketing life, the Meerkat goes back to one and...is bowled!
Cincers lose by one run off the last ball.
Pandemonium as the oppo go wild. Cincers look devastated. We were.
But well played to the Meerkat for a thrilling 33 that took us so close.
Still, beer in the pavilion, a presentation - of a Warsop Stebbing new ball to the victorious opposition skip - and farewell thanks to Sandy and Fatima Buccimazza for hosting us.
The traditional end-of-tour dinner in the Cartaxo hotel featured tour awards, with special citations to Dan for his battling performance on Day One, and for Big Jim for his bowling.
Test Match and the Meerkat were suitably toasted for Day Two's tremendous batting performance but Man of the Tour award went to Max for a fine opening burst and fine all-round effort.
Pass the port.
* Picture caption 1: Big Jim pretends the Albergaria scoreboard is a nightclub bar after being refused entry the night before
* Picture caption 2: 'Does anyone know where the cricket pitch is?' Our dynamic minibus team of Test March and the Meerkat grimace, sorry, grin for the camera.

Helicopter stops play but Cincers lose their way in the heat of the Portuguese sun

Another year, another historic tour for Cincers.
The team travelled the furthest yet in the desperate search for a win - 1,000 miles south of Greenwich Park to a cricket pitch deep in the interior of Portugal via Lisbon.
With vines and olive trees as a backdrop, the Oeiras Cricket Club at Albergaria near Cartaxo on a hot Ribatejo afternoon is about as far as you can get from Caribbean at Tooting under leaden skies.
Sadly, the result was pretty similar but the experience was unforgettable - with fantastic hospitality and welcome from club president Sandy Buccimazza and his wife Fatima.
Day One dawned bright and fair with Cincers setting off in convoy from Lisbon to the pitch, after a slight hitch with the minibus.
There wasn't one. At least, not at the pick-up location in the city. Test Match and Rockie - the anointed driver - had to zip off to the airport to get a replacement.
That done, the team in three vehicles took to the high road for the ground, about 40 miles up the river Tejo from the capital.
Intriguely, Rockie's route involved almost coming off the A1 motorway as soon as he'd got on to it and treating his passengers to a fascinating tour of the backstreets of Lisbon before rejoining the main road one junction on.
And touring wouldn't be touring without one nervous breakdown for the Skip after the minibus missed the turn-off for the ground and arrived - after a car was despatched by the opposition to find it - about 45 minutes after everyone else.
No matter. The Skipper won the toss and put Cincers in.
Test Match, whose credit card had guaranteed the minibus to the tune of 2,000 euros, had obviously focused on helping Rockie avoid scratching the behemoth ('Rockie, the ditch! Avoid the ditch!') and not on his batting.
He got out, for nought.
There then followed a doughty stand against some very fine Oeiras bowling between Selfish and 'Sledger' (some of you know him as Frank) which took us to a healthy 46 before Sledger departed for 29 with the score on 46.
Seventeen runs later, Selfish went too.
In the meantime, Dan set about compiling the highest score for Cincers of 39 in a courageous innings - not least as the Oeiras change bowlers seem decidedly quicker than the openers.
Wickets tumbled in the middle order until Rockie and Max staged a minor revival at the close but Cincers 129 for 8 off 35 was never going to be enough.
In between, the Skipper - ever one for breaking new ground - became the first Cincer to pull away from the strike because a helicopter - dousing a fire in a neighbouring field - was in his line of vision
Just as well. He went to score.......three.
The sumptuous tea - more like a full-blown lunch - with home-made pastries, salads and cakes as well as beer and espresso - took Cincers' mind off the mountain to climb.
Oeiras's generosity in the pavilion was not matched in the field as they put on over 50 before losing a wicket.
A mean spell by Big Jim - three for 24 off seven, including one courtesy of a fine catch by the Vice-Skip - left him the only Cincers bowler to make much of an impression though the Chairman took one for 19 off four and Rockie - henceforth to be known as the Meerkat for his er, idiosyncratic run-up, one for 23 off three.
Oeiras, sportingly led by their skipper Nic Green, eased over the line with five wickets to spare.
Cincers took the hiding like men and handed Oeiras a replica of the Ashes trophy as a momento.
We should have given them a nice engraved trophy too but that stayed in Clapham and missed the flight over.