Max bows out with maiden 50 in tight run chase but Cincers fall short in Kiwi contest

He saved his best till last. Pity Cincers' tail end couldn't quite do the same.
On Max's last outing as a a Cincinnatian at Greenwich Park before he returns to his native NZ, the homesick Kiwi did us proud.
For all his time with Cincers, opener bowler 'Lord Rashbrooke' has been a humble 10 or 11. Like Rockie but with no moaning.
But for his final performance on home soil (he's touring in Croatia so not his last ever game) and with his bad back ruling out bowling, Max was promoted to number three.
My word, he rose to the challenge, A consummate 50, his first ever for Cincinnati, so nearly guided us to victory.
On a humid day in the park, he had only one failing - his sportsmanship and sense of fair play.
Getting a thin edge just after he reached his half-century, the Kiwi walked while umpire Test Match waited for confirmation it had carried. It had but Max was already on his way.
Ironically, the bowler Jack was one of his own countrymen.
The very game, our first against Grafton Lions, was set up to mark Max's departure as the Lions are a Kiwi side with a couple of rogue Aussies thrown in.
They're mates of Chris's...of whom, more later.
The day started nervously. Arriving at the ground, Cincers spotted the young, fit opponents - complete with girlfriend fans - and assumed the worst: humiliation.
The toss lost, we found ourselves in the field in a 35-over contest.
And guess what? The Lions were distinctly less frightening in the flesh, with Jim bowling as well as ever and Stuart steaming in as an Aussie does with the scent of Kiwi wickets in his nostrils.
No luck for him or for Jim to begin with as the Lions struggled for runs but didn't lose a wicket.
But then, it was Max's day.
He broke the deadlock by snaffling a lofted drive off Jim.
It wasn't long before he caught another, also off the big man. Nineteen for 2.
The Lions rallied a bit before the Skip made a fielding change (ok, it was Test Match's idea). He moved out of cover and put Sean there instead.
A lively Saturday night meant the County Clare man's eyes weren't fully open.
No matter. He took a smart catch to give Test Match his first wicket.
Rockie entered the fray, with his slow in-duckers driving opposing skipper Geoff round the bend.
It ended when the batsman played on. 57 for 4.
Sadly for us, the Kiwis panicked and sent two Aussies in. They made hay (the Skip retired after one over for 15!) and reached 172 (er, the scorebook is not clear but it was something like that).
It was not without controversy.
Jim appeared to be denied a nailed-on hattrick when Aussie tailender Miles nicked one behind.
Or so it sounded. He didn't walk. He wasn't given.
We ploughed on.
Earlier, Stuart had finally got one wicket when he deserved a couple more while Sean opened his eyes to take a blinder off Chris's, er, varied bowling. Apparently, it's all that hurling they do in Ireland. Makes them cats in the field.
It's rubbing off on the rest of us. The performance in the field was one of our best, with Keith and others saving plenty of runs out on the boundary.
Someone called Will was keeping wicket. Remember him?
He re-introduced himself which some fine glove work and a very smart stumping off Tom.
Test Match did the tea (enough pasta for a battalion and the delicious trademark Mrs Ross brownies).
Wickets - four for Jim, two for Test Match, one apiece for Stuart, Rockie, Tom and Chris.
Needing about five an over, Test Match and the Skip (no-one else would open) set off on the chase.
Three balls in, the Skipper decided to show off his fine judgement outside off and watched his off stump disappear behind him. Doh!
Enter the Max. Exit the Test Match - bowled by Lions' opener Jack whose quick arm was to prove Cincers' undoing.
Max arrived at the crease to a hastily-arranged guard of honour from his fellow Kiwis in the opposing side (thanks, lads).
He never really looked back.
Sound defence mingled with some punishing pull shots to set him on his way.
This was against possibly the finest spell of sustained, accurate bowling we've faced in many a day, by the way.
Only at one end were there any wides or no-balls.
But bit by bit, first with Tom partnering him and then with Keith, Cincers kept up with the pace.
Unwisely, though, Keith had earlier told the Skip he was in a rich vein of form. The 'Ballinasloe Basher', as he shall be called, duly perished for a hastily hit 14.
Will arrived. A year or so since his last game, he pretended that he'd forgotten how to bat.
But he was always one of the most powerful hitters in the side and he didn't take long to remember.
One drive back over the bowler's head was a straight as could be - right over middle for four.
It was all just going to plan.
But then, one of the few bad balls Lions sent down did for him - a half-track bouncer which umpire Test Match was about to signal as a wide until Will somehow got an edge trying to hit it into next week.
A setback. However, what's a setback when you have Jim in next?
For the next few overs, the big man combined with Max to send a shiver down the Lions' spines as with controlled hitting, the Cincers duo pressed on and kept up with the rate.
It was all going so well...until Lions' skipper Geoff pulled off a superb catch at short cover to send Jim on his way.
Still, we were in with more than a change. Max was still there. We were still up with the rate.
We also had Stuart, hero of a couple of rearguard actions already this season, to come.
But Lions' Jack was too good. Whipping them down, he did first for Max and then for Stuart.
Sean had earlier gone first ball (can't remember if the eyes were open or not).
Last two men at the crease - Rockie and Chris. Just under three overs left. 17 to win.
Tension. Oh, for a wide or a no-ball.
One over went by with hardly a run scored.
The penultimate started the same way.
But then off the last ball of the 34th, Chris struck gold. He hit an exquisite off-drive.
Hope revived. It went for four.
Last over. Nine needed.
Lions had run out of seamers. Back came their left-arm spinner who had gone for a few.
In a dastardly trick, he changed tack and came over the wicket. It was turning.
Rockie got a single off the first.
More tension. Chris took guard. He played and missed.
Then a stroke of luck. He still played and missed but the keeper did too. Four byes.
Two balls to go. Four to win.
Tragically, Chris did not manage another run and we ended four short.
Only later did Chris whisper that he thought we needed a six.
Ah. Perhaps that explains why he tried to hit the leather off it. Oh well.
A fine game against new, worthy opponents.
But above all, a magnificent send-off for Max.
He'll be with us on tour of course but that's him signing off as a UK-based Cincer as he heads back to Wellington.
Or is it?
Rockie, his traditional tour room-mate, has other ideas. 'He'll be back,' said the Sage of Southend sniffing the air.
If that 50 on Sunday is anything to go by, here's hoping!
:: Our picture shows the Hare and Billet post-match celebrations - left to right: Test Match, Chris, Max, the Skip, Tom and Rockie.

Aux armes, citoyens!

Our picture shows our two gallant French (well, Anglo-French) imports preparing for their first-ever innings yesterday in Whitstable.
They are the new Wright brothers - sons of Mark's brother Paul and born-and-bred in Paris.
Charles (on the left) adopts a traditional upright stance. John favours the Father Times-style pioneered by Mark.
They both performed heroically.
Two Legion d'Honneur medals in the post!

Jim goes berserk by the sea..... to help brave under-strength Cincers cling on for a draw

Mambo Number 5 was playing on Jim's car stereo as he motored down to the seaside but it was Magic Number 5 he gave us yesterday at the wicket.
The big man blitzed Whitstable Labour Club's hitherto miserly bowling to all corners of the ground in one of - no, the finest - displays of controlled hitting by a Cincinnatian.
Eleven fours, four sixes he smote. Some of them went so high they came down with snow on them on a mid-July day with the Kent sun blazing.
Even Brisbane Joe in his pomp would have been left in the shade.
Jim took us single-handedly from the position of a fairly hopeless run chase to within touching distance of victory.
Not just for a few balls . He kept us there for over after over.
But when a wicket fell (Rockie's, if you must know) and with tail end exposed, the batting hero bowed to the Skip's pleadings.
Selfishly, he gave up the prospect of a thrilling century to bat out the remaining balls and stride off 86 not out.
Amazing.
The day dawned with Cincers fielding only six regulars - another week of last-minute phone calls to get anything approaching a full team.
Our generous opponents gave us one player, Peter, while Mark produced his Anglo-French nephews Charles and John plus local lad Jack. Finally, Test Match persuaded Andrew - slip-catching hero of last year's bout v. Weasels - to play.
Plus, the Captain was just out of three days in bed with food-poisoning and was living off dry toast.
Time game rules in Radfall, near Whitstable, with the Labour Club winning the toss and batting.
For the first time in recorded Cincers' history, the Skip opened with his (variable) leggies with Jim steaming in at the other end.
No joy for either initially on a decent, lowish but consistent bounce wicket untiil Whitstable's Peter (their man, not ours) pulled the Skip loftily to Jim's safe hands behind square.
Spirit of Portugal, banished!
Thereafter, we struggled a bit until Test Match's swingers started hooping. He had Whitstable skip Richard (38) snared off a lofted straight drive by, well, who else? Jim.
Two full swinging deliveries got two men for 0 and Rockie got rid of Whitstable's young opener A. Garvey for a finely-made 42.
Jim removed the swashbookling Joey for a swift 31 and it was looking good...until the Skip brought himself back on.
First over, fine. A nice leggie and some superb keeping from Tom produced a sharp stumping and a late wicket.
But the Skip's next over went for 20 - a mixture of bad balls, casual fielding and sharp dropped catch that skipped on for a 4. Rubbish all round.
That left Cincers needing 183 off an estimated 35 overs after tea.
The plan? We always have a plan these days.
Test Match opened with the Skip, with the aim of surviving the openers and laying a platform for Jim and Tom.
All went well to begin until Test Match was well caught at mid-off by Richard in the seventh over for 10.
Tom arrived and we didn't lose another wicket until the 17th over. Problem was, we weren't scoring enough runs either.
The Skip eventually perished (or was that, collapsed?) for a painful 4, proving once again that if you can't find a fielder, give him a call - he finds them with every shot.
Another wicket went down. Jack was bowled.
But enter Jim to begin his best knock yet for Cincers.
With at least seven an over needed, he started carefully then got off the mark with a four. The rest was history.
On the way, Tom perished for a valuable 34.
But others came to partner Jim, including Peter and Rockie. The runs piled up over by over.
Rockie particularly made sure the big man got the strike for the start of several overs in a lengthy stand.
Whitstable looked worried. One fielder even suspected we'd drafted him in from a county first XI.
'Is this guy one of your regulars?' he asked the Skip now umpiring.
The crunch. Five overs left - 42 needed. Five wickets left but with a fragile tail featuring Mark's Parisian nephews (cricket knowledge limited), Andrew and Mark himself.
We faltered. Ony four off the next over.
Then, crucially, Rockie was bowled.
We still hoped but with M. Charles Wright getting run out, there was a real danger of Whitstable's very accurate bowling brothers Ed and Joey (same surname, must be brothers!) skittling us to get a late victory.
The Skip intervened to ask Jim to put the brakes on with us needing 29 off the last three.
If he'd got out going for glory, it would have been curtains for Cincers.
So the game was drawn, another very fine match at Radfall but then for some reason, they always are.
Very game opposition, a friendly welcome and brilliant weather.
Thanks to Peter, Jack, Andrew, Charles and John for helping us out.
Thanks to Whitstable Labour Club CC for a great day.
But above, Magic Number 5, please take a bow!

'Get up and run!' yells Selfish but late brownies arrival leaves Cincers on the deck

They're like cavalry coming over Cincers' hill. They were freshly baked on the day. They tasted as delicious as ever.
Just one problem. They came too late.
Cincers' traditional supply of brownies, baked by Test Match's better (and we do mean better) half Amy, has powered us to many a fine victory.
But on Sunday at Greenwich Park against the mighty Finchley, the moist, magic morsels arrived after we had started our innings.
Tea had been taken. Selfish and Test Match were already at the crease.
Only the Skipper managed to scoff one before he went out to umpire.
Result? We lost.
In reply to Finchley's 213 for 7 off 36, Cincers got as far as 162 before keeling over, all out off 30.1 overs.
Selfish got 48, Stuart struck a promising 23 but that was more or less it.
The wickets tumbled even while the brownie tin stayed (almost) unmolested next to the scoreboard.
Expecting the full force of a Finchley Second Eleven (due to a mix-up their end), the Skip had negotiated a face-saving, time game format.
As it happened, our opponents sent down a team largely made up of Colts. Young ones. The sort of players that can bend down quickly and stop the ball. In our terms, cheats!
Imagine the shock, then, when we start very strongly against their batting.
Two astonishing catches - one by Abid at mid-on and a remarkable slip catch by Test Match - had the 'kids' reeling.
Dan had already snaffled a fine chance at mid-off, the first of Stuart's three well-deserved wickets in a powerful opening spell of nine overs.
At the other end, the accurate, crafty medium-pacers of Frank (drafted in from FInchley to help us out as usual) had even Finchley's star player - Aussie youngster Nick - struggling to find his touch.
Sadly, he soon found it, first guiding, then hitting, his team to a big score.
Our ground fielding was nowhere near as sharp as our catching and there was a fair amount of disarray with Finchley stealing singles almost at will. Not good.
Frank, who had pulled off a smart caught and bowled, was reduced to sledging his own fielding side.
He did get some revenge on young Nick.
Brought back by the Skip towards the innings' end (after his own leggies went, well, the way they often do - over the boundary), he bowled Nick on 98.
In reply, Cincers did start well, with Selfish picking off the bad balls along with punishing the odd good one.
Problem was the bowling. They aim at the stumps, these lads.
Hence Test Match's departure early on for 10 after one swung in and messed up his wicket.
Alex B showed his usual languid, left-hand promise until he got one that didn't bounce.
Before that, he also got one from Selfish - a hammered straight drive that hit him on the hand and left him sprawling at the non-striker's end.
Dazed and confused, all he could hear was a yell of 'Get up and run!' as Selfish belted down the wicket, clearly outraged that Alex had stopped him getting a four.
Dan struck one mighty straight six before also perishing to a grubber and heads went down when Selfish was caught and bowled for 48.
The heads went back up again when Stuart arrived, even though JP and Jack (first game for him and it's July! Censured!) had just come and gone fairly cheaply.
He played some great shots, first with Alex W as a partner and then with the Skip.
Just when we started to hope, he holed out.
Abid and the Skip looked as though they would hold out with about eight overs left but the Skip played too early and popped one up for silly mid-off catch (one of his favourite dismissals, that. Complilation video to follow).
Frank, who had been fielding for the oppo (did I mention they only had nine players? Better not), was out first ball. No sledging at that point. All over.
We ended up 51 runs short.
Some stats: Stuart 3 for 28 off 9, Frank 2 for 38 off 10, Tim 1 for 40 off 7, Abid 0 for 38 off 5, Selfish 1 for 30 off 3 and the Skip 0 for 25 off 2.
Other batting: Alex B 15, Dan 12, JP 4, Jack 4, Alex W 14, the Skip 9, Frank 0 and Abid 0 not out.
:: Our picture shows a plate of delicious brownies pausing for breath on their way to Greenwich Park on Sunday.